Since last week was a little more serious I thought Id write something a little more fun today. When I started this blog I said I would write about advice but also my experiences. So I'm going to talk about my painfully awkward first kisses. Yes I said kisses since the first "kiss" happened in the 1st grade (yea I know first grade and it was on the cheek but still a funny story) and then my next post will be my actual first kiss. Prepare yourself.
I spent my first grade in Seaside Oregon and I went to Seaside Heights Elementary School. I only went there for one year because we moved in the second grade but I loved that school. It had a cool layout and a wonderful huge playground, at least that's how I remember it.
My best friend was a Hispanic girl named Selena. She was outgoing, girly, sassy, pretty, and every other adjective you can associate with a Latina, stereo typically speaking. I image her now as the type of person who went after what she wanted in life and got it, by force if necessary. Selena was the complete opposite of who I was. I was quiet and a tom boy. Every girl in our class had a crush on a boy named Tyler. Tyler was outgoing and had blonde hair and blue eyes, and a little arrogant. The type of person who I see now as a former frat boy trying to find his place in the real world. A world where your boss isn't impressed by how smug you are or how many beer cans you can crush on your head. (Boy that wasn't judgmental)
Tyler only liked one girl. Me. I didn't care about boys, I mean, I was in the 1st grade and liked to collecting frogs and rollie pollies outside. The only boy I "liked" was a dorky boy named Simon. Because he was smart, funny and really nice to me. Regardless of how uninterested I was in boys somehow I had a "boyfriend". For two reasons 1) I was the only girl Tyler liked and he didn't take I like rollie pollies more than boys as an answer 2) Selena said I had to.
The playground had everything lots of swings, a huge jungle gym type thing, and even a huge monster truck tire on it's side you could climb into. Everyone loved that tire, it became a hideout. I preferred the monkey bars, however me and Selena spent lots of time in that tire talking about boys and Disney princesses.
One day Selena told me to meet her in the tire at recess. She kicked everyone out to show me what she "borrowed" from her mom. It was red lipstick. I knew what it was but I had zero interest in makeup. She begged and begged me to put some on with her. She told me "Tyler will love it". What? I know I know this girl acted way too old for her age. Eventually I put some on to shut her up and then she invited Tyler into the tire. Tyler climbed in and said "what's on your face!?"
Lipstick 1, Selena 0
Selena kicked everyone out and away from the tire and told everyone one to leave us alone.
One kid yelled
"why are they going to kiss?"
Selena replied
"Yup".
I was horrified. Um ew! Tyler asked me if we were really supposed to kiss and I replied with a simple "No!"
I tried to get out and Tyler pulled me back in. He asked me not to leave and to sit with him and throw rocks. We weren't allowed to throw rocks, in the tire was the only time we could get away with it. We stayed in there talking about all kinds of things like cartoons and school. It was the first time I actually liked Tyler and he didn't irritate me. I kept asking if we should leave and he kept saying we were fine. Finally I told him, against his request, I was going to peek out of the tire. He gave in and said ok and before I moved he kissed me on the cheek. I was both horrified and oddly excited to tell Selena what happened. I pretending like it didn't happened, didn't say a word, and peeked out of the tire.
Everyone. Was. Gone.
I knew were gonna be in so much trouble! I told Tyler, more like yelled it, and ran back to class. And, of coarse, we were in trouble. The teacher said she was looking for us and then she asked me what was all over my mouth. I can't imagine Selena applied the lipstick I forgot all about very well. I was so embarrassed I had to wash me lips off at the sink at the back of the classroom while everyone including Simon and Selena's freshly washed mouth was whispering and giggling at me a Tyler being late together and the lipstick on my face. Trust me when I tell you it took me a few years for me to have an interest in boys and even longer to want to put lipstick on my face again.
What kind of Mocha Monday would this be without a moral to the story?
Moral #1: your friends aren't always right.
Moral #2: don't let a novice apply your lipstick
Moral #3: listen to your gut and don't give into peer pressure, especially if lipstick and big tires are involved.
Moral #4: Rollie pollies > boys
Moral #5: a lot of my experience stories are awkward/weird/embarrassing I am human. An awkward human. Get ready for another story on Wednesday.
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